svt as evil exes
Scoops:
YOU single-handedly gave him depression. his friends all hate you now because they have to take turns bringing him groceries and forcing him to shower. obviously it's not your fault but everyone is making it feel like you ruined his entire life by leaving him.
Jeonghan:
"we can still be friends, right?" asks jeonghan. he just really still wants to be your friend because you guys got along so well!!! nevermind the fact that all your future dates find it fucking weird that your ex is all cutesy wutesy and touchy feely with you for some reason.
Josh:
all trace of emotion fades from his face the second the breakup is finalized. he won't really process it until you get with someone new, at which point he will find you, and he we kill you. nothing will be able to trace the crime back to him.
Jun:
he's actually not a horrible ex, it's just horrible that he's your EX and not your boyfriend. i think the worst thing would be that your friends might break bro code and try to get with him after the fact.
hoshi:
will try to steal your friends and get them on his side. makes people pick sides even if they barely know you guys. airs out your dirty laundry. flaunts his new hookups all over social media before running back to you crying begging you to take him back
wonu:
he only knows your exact schedule because you guys were dating. normal! he only goes to all the places you are because of nostalgia. normal! he only stares at you creepily at your workplace for two hours because he misses you. normal! he's definitely over it and not in the bushes outside your house writing sad poetry.
woozi:
writes three albums about the relationship and the breakup. these albums include extremely intimate details that everyone knows are about you and you really wish people knew less! If you try and tell him to stop he'll get offended that you're trying to police his art despite ruining his trust in people irreparably.
dk:
he tried desperately to still be your friend. like he clung onto any little bit of contact he could get until it was so uncomfortable you had to put your foot down and tell him to actually fuck off. this made something in his brain snap and he started laughing while slowly walking away. sleep with one eye open and stay off social media please.
mingyu:
he'll TRY to take it well. Like he really did try to be mature and the bigger person (lol) and not hook up with all your friends just to prove something. He certainly tried not to look like such a sexy wounded animal that all your friends want to sleep with. He did not succeed.
Minghao:
he's infuriating because he tries to minimize whatever you guys had together. He's like oh we were never dating... we just sort of experimented...and he's so firm about that...like why are you suddenly in a position where you have to publicly and angrily declare that you were in a serious, passionate relationship with him!? Especially when it makes his ego so big!?
Seungkwan:
he also wants to still be friends but not in an oblivious jeonghan way. He WILL get you back if he so chooses. And he definitely so chooses as soon as you debut a new partner. And I'm sorry to say you will end up a cheater and he will end up the sexiest homewrecker ever and he'll call you a bad person during sex and I shouldn't be so receptive to the idea of that scenario.
Vern:
he's your ex but he's still in your house all the time because he doesn't know how to cook and you were the one who kept him fed. Texts from ex-bae at 10pm "im hungry" like what am i supposed to do about that!? go get McDonald's!!! "No money help" it's seriously annoying.
Dino:
leaving him was the biggest mistake of your life and he needs you to know that. He's gonna get the best job in the world until you're soooo jealous of his money. His new bf is soooo hot aren't you jealous??? Spends all his time in the gym trying to get a revenge body. His IG is just thirst traps and pics of him in front of fancy things that he probably doesn't own. The worst part is that it sort of works and you do miss him.